The songs that kicked ass and then, some – that kicked my ass…
“What came first – the music or the misery? Did I listen to the music because I was miserable? Or was I miserable because I listened to the music? Do all those records turn you into a melancholy person?”
“Sentimental music has this great way of taking you back somewhere at the same time that it takes you forward, so you feel nostalgic and hopeful all at the same time.”~ Nick Hornby, High Fidelity
I wonder if I consume Music or does Music consume me…
Do I use Music to supplement and enhance all that I do in every waking moment, or does Music control and decide what I feel, how I act, and whether I brew some coffee or instead grab a cold beer?
I guess, in all honesty – it’s been a bit of both, but I’m getting more mindful about consciously curating my playlists. I decide what Music to expose myself to and set the tone for the day.
I mostly play songs in a repeat loop over and again. I latch onto one or it hooks me and then I lose myself in it. 25 times… 50 times… I could lose a day that way.
If careless, Music can easily trap me into inertia and keep me paralyzed – enticing me into the dangerous game of past regrets and time gone by. And – I’m quite careless by nature.
A song can instantly transport you back in time to the moment associated with it in your memory of pain and hold you there – preventing you from moving past it and heal. It’s never a good idea to dwell in the past and revisit memories best buried. But, that song can play you like a drug does an addict.
Music often gives me goosebumps but that can be attributed to different reasons…
Some songs kick you in the nuts, seize your heart, freeze the breath in your lungs, and stomp a hole in you. They cut through you like a blunt serrated knife sawing back and forth violating you with repressed memories. They force you to actually wince, grind your teeth, and mutter curses…
And then, there’s music that can inspire and convince you to Carpe Diem.
Countless times, Music has transformed horrible Workouts into excellent pumps and turned mind-numbing Cooking disasters into relaxing and extremely gratifying art sessions. It’s kept me Painting for hours endlessly after my mind’s shut down and my body has failed.
All comes down to what I choose – misery or power. Yeah, I wrote “Power” cause that’s exactly what I mean. I must control what I allow in my space and in my mind.
(On a tangent… “Life happens in the moments you lose control” but that’s a different post.)
“If I were not a physicist, I would probably be a musician. I often think in music. I live my daydreams in music. I see my life in terms of music.”~ Albert Einstein
These are 45 Most Played Songs in my past year. Most of these elevated my heart rate and fueled my Workout and Cooking. Some forced me to Write. Others left me no choice but to Paint…